Psychology / Children reflect on their parents' divorce

Beshem Hayeladim (On Behalf of the Children: Narratives and Insights of Children of Divorce ), by Dorit Eldar-Avidan Am Oved (Hebrew ), 315 pages, NIS 98

The difference between our decisions and actions and the stories we tell about them are rooted in the absolute of what actually happened. While the actions are one-dimensional, black and white - they either happened or they didn't - stories are multivocal and take on all the colors of the rainbow.

Haaretz Writers Edition now available on Kindle

People get divorced. That is a fact that is part of our lives and that has a very clear legal significance. The narrative of divorce, though, contains all the nuances of emotion and plot, from good to bad. In this story there are two main protagonists: a man and a woman whose marriage is dismantled, whether by choice or not (with a third person sometimes involved ). There are also secondary characters, including the couple's children. Many couples take the good of the children into account when making the decision to break up a family, yet most don't want to, or cannot, consider only the children's desires.

"On Behalf of the Children" tells the stories of divorce from the viewpoint of those children, who are aged 20-25 at the time of the research - close enough to childhood to remember clearly what it was like for their parents to split up and far enough away to be able to reflect on the effect it has had on their lives.

These children are not a silenced majority, but for all that the influence of divorce on children is a frequent topic in Israeli discourse, Dorit Eldar-Avidan, a social worker, is the first to conduct such thorough research on the subject.

Every divorcing couple with children faces the question of what divorce will do to them. To judge by the amount of interest this book raised among friends who saw it lying on my desk at home, this is a question people really want to see addressed. As one of my friends said when he saw the book, it raises the expectation that parents may finally find an answer to the million-dollar question: Will my divorce harm my child? And while we're at it, is there an optimal age when divorce will be least harmful? But those seeking yes-or-no answers should consider themselves warned: The book contains many insights relating to various questions about the impact of divorce on children, but as is the case with good psychological studies, it doesn't tell you which single method is best, and it doesn't purport to reveal whether you've hurt your child or to what extent.

Psychology Of Lying - News


Psychology / Children reflect on their parents' divorce
Psychology / Children reflect on their parents' divorce

To judge by the amount of interest this book raised among friends who saw it lying on my desk at home, this is a question people really want to see addressed. As one of my friends said when he saw the book, it raises the expectation that parents may



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Psychology Of Lying - Bookshelf

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